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Sex Education

Signs you are Not Ready for Sex

Many people, especially teenagers ask themselves if they are ready to have sex. There is no one right time to have sex and everyone is ready to have sex at different times in their lives. Sometimes, our morals and value system determine when we are ready to have sex.
Other times, we rely on both our heads and our hearts to tell us that we are ready to have sex. The decision to have sex is a big decision and should not be a decision that is entered into lightly. The question am I ready to have sex is a question that almost everyone asks themselves at some point in their lives. Unfortunately, not many people will be able to answer it with a definite “yes or no.” You are the only person who knows if you are truly ready to have sex. But, here are some questions that will hopefully help you work it out.

1. Are you having sex because YOU want to have sex? If you are feeling pressure to have sex from your partner or friends then, please don’t have sex.
2. Do I know my partner well enough? If you don’t trust your partner then, you shouldn’t have sex with them. In addition, if you have never kissed the person that you are with, then you are definitely not ready to have sex with them. Moreover, sex can leave you vulnerable afterwards in a way that you are not prepared for., so it is better to be with someone who you know is likely to be sticking around for a while or for the long haul. Usually, you will have better sex with someone you know really well and are comfortable with, and sex will be best with someone you love.
3. Can I talk to my partner about this easily? If you can’t talk about sex, then you are not ready to have sex. It is as simple as that. Honesty about how you are feeling will make it easier for both of you and it will make sex better in the future.
4. Do I know enough about sex?
5. Do we both want to have sex? You may decide that you are ready to have sex but your partner might not be ready to have sex, even if they have had sexual partners before. It is very important to know that for sex to work, you both have to want to do it. Don’t ever pressure anyone to have sex if their not sure; this is very wrong and it will cost you your partner’s respect and the respect of other people. Here is how to know when someone isn’t ready to have sex.
6. Ask your partner. This is the simplest way to find out if they wish to go “all of the way.”
7. Read your partners body language. If they are moving away from you or trying to leave, then STOP! However, if they are warming up to you then, they probably do want to have sex.
8. Listen to the tone of their voice.
9. Always use common sense.
10. Some people want to have sex after a first date and some people want to have sex only after they get married. Everybody is different so it is very important to know what you and your partner wants.
11. You only lose your virginity once. Your partner might not be as eager to lose theirs as you are.
12. Always remember, NO means NO!
13. Good luck, have fun, and stay safe.

Could I Be Pregnant?

Let’s get one thing straight: if you are female, have started your period and are sexually active, YES, you could be pregnant. Many people, especially teenage girls, fell that if they give it the ol double whammy (by using birth control pills AND using a condom) when they have sex that they are 100% sure not to get pregnant…WRONG!
How many of us have resulted from activity that held no promise of a child? There are lots of women who, even after having a tubal ligation, still get pregnant. There are no guarantees. As one physician put it “if you’ve got the parts and having sex, there’s ALWAYS a chance you could be pregnant.”
How do you know for sure, though? Well, there is always the handy dandy EPT! Guaranteed to give you accurate information after only missing one day of your period, this sure-fire way to determine if you’re pregnant or not is just about as accurate as that whole “double whammy” thing you tried to pull.
The only way to know for sure if you are pregnant or not is to see a doctor. There are two blood tests, one that tests for the presence of the “pregnancy hormone” in your system (which is the least accurate) and one that tests the actual LEVELS of that hormone in your blood stream (BINGO…that’s the one!) that can really determine if a zygote is growing inside your uterus.
There are signs and symptoms however, of pregnancy. Not all of these signs may be present and these signs being present do not necessarily mean that you are pregnant, so pay attention! Morning sickness: the most recognizable form of pregnancy. With this symptom, you are not hungry in the morning and therefore do not eat. Likewise, your stomach rejects even its own contents and you vomit.
Another one: weight loss or weight gain. Seems silly-right? Well, if you look at it logically (like you should have during the preventative phase of this whole process) it makes perfect sense. If you’re constantly getting sick, then you’re not retaining calories and you’re loosing weight. On the opposite side, if you are retaining your calories and eating more than normal (though you might not realize it yet) you will gain weight. As appropriate, the weight will be slowly distributed to the zygote, turning fetus to supply him or her with all the nutrients he or she will need to grow into a healthy human being.
HUMAN BEING! Yes, that is what a pregnancy denotes. If you are pregnant, it is imperative that you decide what route to take. Are you going to proceed with the pregnancy or terminate it? Are you going to keep the baby or place the baby in a caring adoption agency’s control to pass to a loving couple desiring a child for years? Are you going to raise and love the baby as your own and start planning for your future with this child as a part of your family? Those are all weighty decisions and ones that need to be made as soon as possible. There are many agencies and organizations ready to help assist you in your decision making process. Could you be pregnant? Yes, you could.

No Easy Decision

Whenever the subject of abortion is raised, it’s rare that controversy doesn’t follow. Feelings about the issue can be very strong and incredibly divisive. But no matter which stance we take, one thing is hard to argue: facing an unplanned pregnancy is rarely easy, especially for teens. MTV’s No Easy Decision is a special that focuses on this situation. The show, which first aired last December, features three teens who choose to end their unplanned pregnancies.
No Easy Decision respectfully shares the stories of teens Katie, Markai and Natalia without judgment, emphasizing the complexity of their circumstances and the steps each takes to learn about her choices. They consider adoption and the realities of parenting. (Markai, for instance, worries about her college plans and financial future). The show provides an honest description of the situations teens can face when dealing with unplanned pregnancies and, at times, is very moving.
No Easy Decision gives voice to a subject that is not often discussed in the open in such a frank and sensitive way. Already facing what is indeed “no easy decision,” these teens have also found the courage to share their stories. And even if some viewers may disagree with their decisions, their strength and willingness to reach out to viewers, who might themselves be facing the same choice, is worth respecting.

Gonorrhea, You’re Going Down

We had something else to be thankful for besides family, friends and turkey this year. Just in time for Thanksgiving, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) released a report showing that sex in the United States was noticeably in 2009. Ten percent fewer cases of gonorrhea were reported in 2009 than in 2008. And the rate of syphilis infections among women didn’t rise—something that hasn’t happened in five years. These stats are of course great news, but I’d also like to think that they mean Americans are having safer sex in general. That could potentially mean we’ll see drops in other STDs and unplanned pregnancies for 2010. Maybe it’s just me (my university, after all, happened to rank first in Trojan’s 2010 Sexual Heath Report Card), but I feel like lower rates of STDs and unplanned pregnancy are New Year’s resolutions we might actually be able to keep.

Survey Says…Teens Use Condoms More Than Adults

Correct me if I’m wrong, but don’t many adults consider teens irresponsible? As a teen myself, I think we deserve a lot more credit. Why, you ask? Well, an extensive study of American’s sexual activity found that condom use is common for sexually active teens. Eighty percent of sexually active guys and 69 percent of sexually active girls said they used a condom the last time they had intercourse. In contrast, over 90 percent of men over the age of 50 did not use a condom during their last sexual encounter with a date or friend. And seventy percent of that same group did not use a condom when they had intercourse with a stranger. It looks like we teens make smart decisions after all.
Of course, not every teen in America is having sex. However, those that are sexually active are making healthy decisions and practicing safer sex. Are teens really so irresponsible? I don’t think so. In fact, teens are more responsible about using condoms than adults. Now I really understand why some adults say, “Do as I say, not as I do.”